SO CRAZY IT JUST MIGHT WORK: FEAR THE REAPER

This is going to be the first of an ongoing segment where I talk about some insane army list ideas that revolve around a bat-shit-crazy idea that could potentially do an enormous amount of damage, or could crash and burn so hard you might as well have not even rolled any dice.

Lets start with a Dark Eldar CAD.  Take 2 characters, one with the Armour of Misery, the other with the Arch Angel of Pain, and one of them with a Webway portal.

Then we move on to two level 3 Sorcerers from the Crimson slaughter book, they will roll their powers on Telepathy for the most part, Psychic Shriek, Dominate, and Terrify being the important considerations.

Next we incorporate the Formation Kranon's Helguard.

Finally we consider the Crimson Slaughter warlord trait Maelstrom of Torment.

At this point you should have about 500 points to fill in the blanks and buy upgrades and transports and such.

So what do you get when you combine all those things together?  Lets do the math...

The Armour of Misery dishes out a -2Ld to anyone within 6", Kranon's Helguard add a -1Ld if you are within 12" of any unit, Terrify adds yet another -1Ld to the target unit, and if you happen to get Maelstrom of Torment, that will add another -1Ld.  Add all those negatives together and you get a whopping -5Ld penalty.

Then you cast Dominate on one unit, and Psychic Shriek on the other and watch and your enemies army either runs away, dies, or stands there dumbfounded

Add to that the Archangel of Pain which piles on another -2Ld penalty when it activates, although it doesn't effect units with Fearless or ATSKNF, for a whopping -7Ld check that inflicts a wound for each point you fail by on each unit with 9"

So lets have a look at my test army...

Kranon's Helguard:
Chad Lord, Axe of Blind Fury, MOK, Aura of Dark Glory
Cultist (x10) flamer
Cultist (x10) flamer
Land Raider, Fourth Quadrant Rebellion Legacy of Ruin
Terminators (x3) x3 combi-meltas
Chosen (x5) no upgrades
Helbrute
Raptors (x5) x2 melta-guns, meta-bomb

Dark Eldar CAD
Archon, Armour of Misery, webway portal, Venom (x2 splinter cannons)
Haemonculus, Archangel of Pain
Warriors (x5), blaster, Sybarite, Phanasm grenade launcher, Raider, dark lance, shock prow
Warriors (x5), blaster, Sybarite, Phanasm grenade launcher, Raider, dark lance, shock prow

Crimson Slaughter CAD
Sorcerer, level 3, Sigil of Corruption, spell familiar, Warlord
Sorcerer, level 3, spell familiar
Cultists (x10) flamer
Cultists (x10) flamer

The basics are as follows...
Turn 1, try to open as many transports as possible with the Land Raider, Raiders and warriors, Helbrute, and Raptors.

Turn 2, deep strike the Archon and Haemonculus somewhere really close to the enemy, getting as many units within 6" as possible, the Armour of Misery gives them -2Ld.  Then drop in the Terminators somewhere useful, distracting, or sneaky.  Meanwhile I move up with Kranon's Helguard, the Lord, both sorcerers, and the chosen in the Landraider and deploy within striking distance.  If I managed to roll Maelstrom of Torment, that is a further -2Ld, if not it's only -1Ld.  Then I use the Raider with it's shock prow to ram any AV12 and under facing possible as a last ditch effort to open any transports.

In the Psychic phase I try to cast as many powers as I can throwing minimal dice and relying on the spell familiar.  I realize that one of the sorcerer's will have to bail out of the squad in order to be ale to cast multiples of the same power, but it's a sacrifice worth making for this to work.
I'll start with Terrify on units affected by the other penalties that's a further -1Ld.  This may cause them to run if they are not fearless.
Then I move on to Dominate, which I will cast on units not targeted by Terrify but still being affected by the other Ld effects.  This will help ensure my safety as those units won't be able to retaliate...I hope.
Then I cast the Shrieks on the units I want to die.  With a potential -5 to their Ld, Psychic Shriek will inflict 5-6 wounds on average assuming the target was originally Ld10, which it probably wont' be.

In the shooting phase I work on popping more of the transports and use the Phantasm Grenade Launchers and Archangel of Pain for more Ld shenanigans(assuming I'm not playing Space marines).  The Archangel of Pain forcing a Ld check with a possible -7Ld modifier.  Ouch.

Turns 3 and 4 are Rinse and Repeat as long as I am alive.  There is an added bonus to the Helguard, if an enemy unit is within 12" of 2 or more units of the Helguard, they get a -1BS modifier as well.  Top that off with the fact that most of the army causes Fear you should be relatively safe in the assault phase.  I also want to keep the Cultists as a barrier from deep striking units getting tot he Land raider and the Legacy of Ruin will keep them fearless as long as the tank is alive.  Those 3 things will help keep me alive to deliver the payload.

So, what do you guys think?  Is it crazy enough that it just might work?  Or an insane idea destined to fail?  Let me know in the comments.

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.

DARK ELDAR: FASTER THAN FURIOUS

Here we are, the finally of the Dark Eldar shitty units review.  What a ride it has been.  Without further ado, lets get into the Heavies.

Both the Talos and the Chronos are rather good Monstrous creatures.  They get a wide variety of funky weapons to choose from and can be taken in units of up to 3.  Their biggest downfall is that they only have 3 wounds, but at 120 and 100 points, respectively, and FNP, they are a pretty hard nut to crack.  The Coven supplement only makes them better as several of the formations include the Talos and Chronos and only add more special rules to them.

Another popular unit is the Ravager.  With 3 heavy weapons that can be used to take out heavy infantry or be upgraded to take out tanks, it's a vital unit in the typical Dark Eldar army, fielding at least 2.

Which leaves us with the Voidraven Bomber.  The only shitty Heavy choice in the book oddly enough.  It comes armed with 2 Void Lances, which are Lascannons with Lance, and a Void Mine, which has the same stats but is a large blast bomb.  You can swap the Void Lances for Dark Scythes which are 24" S8 AP 2 small blast, but I think this thing is probably best used to take out heavy vehicles.  If you feel that there won't be much that's able to take it down, you could add a hefty missile payload.  Personally I would take the Shatterfield missile as it's pretty useful against a parking lot of light vehicles or lots of infantry.  This will pump the cost up to 200 points, for an AV 10 flier, but having the ability to open up multiple rhinos who happen to get too close has got it's benefits.

So that's it for Heavies, a little surprising actually since Dark Eldar are supposed to be a fast moving, hard hitting style army.

So, onto Wargear... which I think might be a long one as it seems like wargear isn't a big spending point on the typical armies.  Usually those points go to more models and more shooting.

The first piece of shit gear I'm gonna yak about is the Phantasm Grenade Launcher.  This thing is absolutely useless against more than half of the units out there being anything that's Fearless or anything with ATSKNF.  The great thing about this weapon is that it works against Eldar, or at least most of their units, and the Dark Eldar have ways of lowering your Ld to make this weapon even more effective.  Another good thing about this weapon is that you just have to hit the target.  You don't have to do any damage, and there is potential for it to do quite a bit of damage.

I'm sure this guy has one of the gauntlet weapons.

The mindphase and flesh gauntlets are decent weapons but are widely unpopular due to their lack of AP.  Both of these weapons are limited to 3 units that can take them, and 2 of those units don't need either because they already have weapons just as good, which means the only model that can benefit from them is the haemonculus and he isn't going to take either of these ones over the venom blade or the Scissorhand which are vastly better in a general sense.  The flesh gauntlet has a place as it can cause ID and it's poinson 4+, so it's got a chance at killing big MC's with a mediocre save.  The mindphase also has an awkward spot against heavy hitters who would hit before, or at the same time as the Haemonculus's unit but after the haemonculus.  He can hit the target with concussive and allow the rest of his unit to hit the enemy first, reducing the amount of damage they take as a result.

The hex rifle is another oddball.  It's far too unreliable to be worth taking, but if it pays off, it's amazing.  It has the sniper rule which includes junior rending and Precision shot.  It also has a rule that if you happen to make a precision shot the resulting wound causes ID.  Which means that if you roll a 6 to hit, and a 6 to wound, your opponent is one failed look out sir and invul save away from becoming a greasy stain.  See what I mean about unreliable.  It is only 10 points, and it's assault weapon, so if you have a couple points you could throw the guy in a transport and have him cruise around taking potshots.

With my previous 2 tactic articles, the chain snares and shock prow seem like pretty good pieces of gear.  I particularly like the shock prow as it's allows you to slam into other light vehicles at will and be completely impervious to the impact and deal out a S7 hit.

So, a vehicle can take a weapon called a Torment Grenade Launcher.  Sounds familiar right?  Kinda like Phantasm Grenade Launcher, well they are the exact same fucking thing.  The only difference is that the one that is mounted on a vehicle has 6 extra inches.  Now I know what I could do with 6 extra inches, but this isn't it.  Everything you want to know about this weapon, look above.

Almost all of the Artefacts range between total crap to meh, but each one has a situation that makes it useful.  The Animus Vitae is a little expensive, but it's payoff is pretty huge.  An 8" AP2 weapon and if it causes a wound it EVERY model on the table with Power from Pain adds one to the chart.  Do you remember all those times in previous posts where I said "depending on the Power from Pain chart..."  This has the ability to make all those dreams come true.
The Archangel of Pain is basically a nova version of the Phantasm Grenade Launcher with a -2 Ld penalty.  If you can tag team this with another character with the Armour of Misery, that would be a -4 Ld check for every unit within 9", triple team those 2 items with a web way portal then you got yourself a nuke.  Again, it doesn't work on anything Fearless or has ATSKNF, so it's a trick that, 60% of the time, it works every time.

And that's it for my Dark Eldar post.  Hope you guys had a good time reading it.  Feel free to leave thoughts and ideas in the comments section.

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.

DARK ELDAR: TWO FAST, 1/2 FURIOUS

Alright, lets not piss around with introductions and lets dive right into the Elites slot starting with, probably my favourite model and unit available to Dark Eldar, the Incubi.

In my personal opinion these guys are absolutely bad ass.  A unit of 3 (one upgraded to Klaivex) will kill 4 MEQ's on the charge and that number will increase in later turns when they get Furious Charge.  They have a 3+ save, Fleet, and a high enough I and WS to be going first, hitting often and doing the damage it needs to do to survive and win that combat.

I normally don't talk about special characters but for Drazhar I will make an exception.  This guy has an imposing(for Eldar) S and T of 4, a 2+ save, is fearless, has eternal warrior, fleet, rampage, and gains an additional attack for each roll to wound of a 6.  He can only join a unit of Incubi, but he boosts their WS by 1 making them elite unit and medium HQ killers.  He does not have an invul save, but at I 7 and potentially 9 attacks, him and his Incubi don't have too much to fear in the assault phase considering Him and 5 friends will kill 9 MEQs or 5 TEQs WITHOUT furious charge.
He is 190 points, but he is quite possibly the beastiest 190 point character in the game.

Mandrakes have gotten significantly better since their previous iteration.  I actually did a Misfit episode on them a couple years ago on the 40Kegger Blog so you can go there and check it out, although it's a bit outdated.
These guys com with a host of special rules that scream stealthy killers and when it comes to low T and armour targets, they are.  They come with a shooting attack that's S4 AP4 assault 2, and since they can Infiltrate, they will most likely be able to use it turn 1.  This attack is great for putting a couple quick wounds on some backfield "deck chair" units.  It also causes Soul Blaze which could do a couple more wounds.
Adding to the sneaky feel, they come with Shrouded AND Stealth, meaning they will have a 2+ cover save in just about any cover they are in.  This makes them pretty durable and forces your opponent to put something specific into them to get rid of them, and because the unit only cost 36 points it will feel like a huge waste having that fire power dumped into them and not your other actually deadly units.
If your opponent decides to ignore them, figuring he can put up with the minimal fire power they put out, Mandrakes put out a little hurt in the assault phase.  Choosing the right target is key, but with 2 attacks each, S4, and Fear, they can go to town on an artillery piece or a heavy weapon team.

Wracks are a pretty decent choice, the liquefier gun and ossefactor being pretty good weapons.  They also start with FNP and have T4.  They are slightly more points than a Warrior, but their weapon upgrades are vastly different giving them a place in a list.

Grotesques are in a similar boat as Wracks, with the addition of being incredibly durable considering the rest of the Dark Eldar unit list.  They do suffer from having a very low Ld and relative high cost, but T5, FNP, and 3 wounds will keep them hanging around and their high number of attacks and Rampage will help them mow through light infantry.

The beast pack was once the best deathstar unit in the game.  It typically required a variety of beasts to accomplish different tasks, and a couple Eldar Farseers for Invisibility.  Now no one uses it because Windrider Jetbikes are better and the assault phase is becoming more and more a dead phase, unless you can stomp.  However there is still a use for a couple smaller units of these guys floating around ready to pounce and with a decent mix you can keep the unit at T5, and with good placement you can keep them that way.  Most of the models have a decent number of attacks and either a decent S or a way to ignore saves be it access to fancy wargear or Rending.  One particular nice thing about this unit is there are no characters, so your Beastmaster with power weapon, or Agonizer if you feel ballsy as fuck, can't get challenged out and negated.

Next up are the Raiders and Venoms.  I've already mentioned that they get used often, mainly as a gun platform, but being fast open-topped skimmers also makes them excellent assault vehicles able to position units quickly.  They are open-topped, which makes them rather dangerous to ride around in.  This is a big reason why no one takes critical assault units, when the transport blows up the unit inside takes maximum damage due to low T and saves.

Reavers are really good and I have seen quite a few lists that take as many as possible, load them up with Cluster caltrops and a well positioned Grav-talon and then smash them into invisible units.  8 HoW at S4 with Rending and up to 4D6 S6 HoW with Rending.  Then Combat Drug infused attacks at I6 and they can Hit and Run after that.  With the Realspace Raiders Detachment you can have 6 units of fast attack choices.  Its a pity you can't get a bike for any characters.

Hellions had a place a couple revisions ago when "the Baron" was a thing.  I'm not sure what he did, but he was good.  Hellions have a lot of rules and with all of them you think they would be great, but they are still only T3 with a 5+ save.  They do get Combat Drugs, so potentially, at around turn 3 you could have a S6 unit of charging Hellions on your hands.  I mainly see these guys as a distraction unit.  Charge in, get a couple hits in then hit and run out into the enemies backfield.  Now your opponent has to decide whether to spend firepower to kill them or ignore them as they aren't really much of a threat, but they can be a pain once Furious Charge is activated and their guns, Assault 2 18" poison 4+.

The Razorwing jet fighter is quite good.  It can get a lot of shots and put out a world of hurt on infantry units.  Ironically, it's far better at that than actually fighting jets although it can be upgraded to get 2 Dark Lances.

Scourges are a bloody mystery to me.  They have the best save in the army, despite being fleet footed jump infantry, and they can take heavy weapons, although I think your best bet is to take assault weapons.  These guys can be used to shore up any kind of firepower that your army is lacking.  Missing some anti-tank?  Blasters, Heat Lances, Haywire blasters, and Dark Lances.  A little anti-infantry? They come stock with Shardcarbines and can get Shredders and Splinter Cannons.  They are rather expensive at 16 points a pop, but with their versatility almost any army can find a spot for them.

That's it for these 2 categories.  Next post will cover Heavy support and wargear.  Probably more wargear than Heavy support.

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.

MISFIT TACTICS: The Smash and Grab

Like my last tactic I talked about, this one will also require driving your vehicle directly at an enemy.  However, this one is a little more specific.

In order to pull of this ridiculous, last ditch, desperate attempt at what ever it is, you need to have a vehicle that has the Assault rule, preferably weak armour, one hull point left, and have the ability to tank shock or ram.  So Orks and Dark Eldar stick out as immediate candidates if their vehicles have the right upgrades

Now typically troops can only disembark from a vehicle if it has moved no more than 6", but if you tank shock or ram something and happen to wreck your vehicle, the passengers must disembark regardless of how far you traveled.

So if you just so happen to Ram into something, or Tank shock someone and they Death or Glory (and if they read my last tactic, they will probably do that) and your vehicle gets wrecked, the guys can get out then assault during the assault phase.

This can also work for Non-assault unit and wanting to shoot.  Since the movement of the vehicle only effects models shooting out of it, if your vehicle is wrecked from tank shock or ramming, you are free to shoot normally once you get out.

Be warned, this could backfire in your face terribly.  If your vehicle is penetrated you must take a Ld test or only snap fire and then a pinning check for the vehicle getting wrecked.

Let me know what you guys think.

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.

DARK ELDAR: FAST, NOT FURIOUS

So as I was watching a twitch feed from Frontline Gaming I decided to plug my blog there.  Fankie scoffed and said "I'd like to see what you do with Dark Eldar."

Well Frankie, this one is dedicated to you.

Now before I go into the actual good stuff I want to talk a little about the feel of a Dark Eldar army and what it means to players.

As you guys have seen, I like to include a lot of pictures in my posts, almost one for every entry I talk about and I rarely use model shots.  I like to use artwork as it gives a look into what the fan base think of the army and holy fuck was I disappointed.

When I searched for pics on Dark Eldar, there were way too many nearly naked women with nearly pristine creamy white skin and huge tits who don't strike bowel quivering fear into my heart.

I found all 3 of the above pics and went through dozens more before I got to one above, and I feel like it embodies what the army is supposed to look and feel like.

Anyway, onto the content and boy to I have my work cut out for me as almost every unit in the codex is so rarely used its going to feel like I'm doing a whole army review.  As many of you know, the typical Dark Eldar army consists of as many Venoms as you can cram in with some ravagers as back up and maybe a Razorwing or 2.  Typically in the Venoms is either full of Kabalite warriors or Trueborn with special weapons.  That's about it, this army heavily relies on it's shooting ability and it's poison to do any damage to infantry, and on it's lance weapons for the heavy lifting, but I feel that this army can be so much more and has far too much potential in the close combat phase for it to be so largely ignored.

So, to start things off once again, lets take a look at the special rules, of which there are only 2 and only one of them is really an army rule.

Power from Pain is a rule with potential, however I feel that they got the order of the rules mixed up.  The idea behind the rule is that as the battle rages on, the Dark Eldar army gets stronger as more and more pain is inflicted on anyone in the vicinity as Dark Eldar seem to absorb it like some kind of emotional sponge and use it to fuel them to even greater deeds creating more pain and feeding them more.

There are ways to boost this though, such as the Crucible of Malediction, the Haemonculus's Master of Pain rule, and the Architect of Agony rule from the formation.  This boost almost makes the Crucible a worth while upgrade even though it's not a sure thing, but getting this rule boosted up to Turn 4 is critical to get any kind of results from your normal grunts, not that their rapid fire guns will allow them to charge anything.

The Combat Drugs are an improved version of what they were, as they are free.  I'm sure the cost of them is incorporated some how in the cost of the model, but that is tricky to do when only half of the results will actually benefit you in any meaningful way.  +1 to WS, I, or Ld is not going to make or break the game, but at the same time, +1 to A, S, or T could.  This is totally random and included so there isn't really much I can tell you by the way of tactics.

The Archon is pretty much a close combat killer no questions about it.  His biggest downfalls being his S and T of 3.  Now his low S can be mitigated as many of the weapons available are poison weapons.  I see many builds focus around him with a Husk Blade, but with his low S I feel that giving him a weapon like an Agoniser will be more useful against regular schmoes, which are far more numerous in every list.  His I and WS are very high and with an Agoniser he is likely to dish out 2 wounds per turn regardless of the enemies T.  Pair this with a Soul Trap and he is likely to be re-rolling failed wound rolls in no time.  Watch out for guys with 2+ saves though...  There is something that I noticed people playing wrong, when he loses his first wound with a Shadowfield, he doesn't loose the Shadowfield save until the END OF THE PHASE.

I have seen many lists that have an Archon Court, or at least one member from it, as the sole HQ choice.  This is done in order to minimise points "wasted" and could instead be used for more venoms.

However, when you look at what this unit has to offer, and how it can be used, it's pretty amazing.  This unit has several different uses.  You all remember the old version of the Flamer of Tzeentch right?  With the AP3 template, well the Medusae has that for about the same cost, add a web way portal and they won't scatter.  But you don't want to just load up on those as you will only kill EVERYTHING within template range, so add in a couple Slyth for some Assault 3 poison guns and since they have T5, make sure they outnumber the rest of the T3 models and the whole unit gets T5.  Put an Archon with the Court (go fucking figure right??) and have the Archon tank all day long with T5 and a 2++ and when you get to those dodgy S6 shots you can LOS those to the Slyth who have FNP all on their own and actual T5.

Now the Medusae and the Slyth are expensive units, but 3 Slyth, 2 Medusae, the Archon with WWP, and the transport you will want to use to make sure they can get the best movement and range (you can disembark from a vehicle that Deep Strikes) will run you a little over 300 points.

Suitably scary, yet still uncomfortably sexy.

Honestly, I'm not sure if there is much of an actual in-game difference between the Succubus and the Archon.  There are a couple different weapon options, and the Succubus comes with a 4++ in combat, but they will essentially do the exact same thing once they hit the table.  There is one big difference that I can see, the Succubus can take an Archite Glaive which gives her an AP2 option.

Now, the Haemonculus is a pretty popular choice and is usually more popular than both the Archon and the Succubus.  He has a wide array of exotic weapons he can choose from, many of which are useful.  He is also the only HQ choice allowed in the Covens supplement where he is better with even crazier gear.

The Kabalite warriors are the mainstay of most army builds.  They can upgrade into Trueborn which make them better with more weapon upgrades available to them.  In the typical list you see both units min-maxed to the balls and shoved in Venoms only to be release when the damn thing blows up.

Here we go again with the boobs.  Wyches suck.  They are not nearly deadly enough to even be considered a "glass cannon" and they have such a variety of weapons that its almost as much work keeping track of them as it is a Seer Council's psychic powers.

They will, however, benefit from all but 2 of the outcomes from their Combat Drugs.  The extra I and Ld isn't going to do them much in most circumstances.  There is also this weird push to take them in units of 10 which lets 3 of them choose special Wych weapons instead of 1 in a smaller unit, the problem being that once you take 10 of them you can't add a character to the unit and sill have them fit in a Raider.  What the fuck is that all about?  Anyway...

The special weapons that they can take are AP5 and have special rules that all revolve around re-rolling failed hits and failed wounds.  This helps make up for their low attack count and miserable stats (pray you get a good roll on the Combat Drugs).  Their low AP is frustrating as it is really only useful against units where you weren't really worried about their armour save.

The Hecatrix can at least get some AP3 weaponry by way of a power sword or Agoniser and can also get Haywire grenades and a Blaster Pistol.

The key to using them is target choice.  You can take a big unit in a Raider and use them to hunt small units that they can kill.  They should be able to handle a small scout unit, and anything with fewer than 10 models and a not scary overwatch with a save of 5+ will go down to these guys.

You can also use them as a tar pit against a unit or model with a low number of high S low AP attacks as they have a 4++ once in combat.

Alternately you could take small units of them with a Hecatrix armed with a Blaster pistol and Haywire and use them to open vehicles.  This essentially makes them a rather expensive suicide unit and is probably the least effective way to use them.

That's it for this post, special rules, HQ's and Troops are all secured neatly with a bow, next time I'll move onto Elites.

Feel free to comment and let me know what you think.

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.

DEM TRICKSY ORKS: DA FORCE FIELD TAKTIK

So as I was writing the Ork posts I found a thing, a good thing I think.  It centres around this guy...

The ork Weirdboy.

I was inspired when I noticed that the ork Weirdboy can take powers from the Daemonology discipline.  Now I had seen a couple lists where guys tried to use their Weirdboy to summon daemons which always ended in disaster because you perils on any doubles and the high casting cost of summoning pretty much guarantees a perils.  Then I though "What about sanctic powers?"

Most of the powers in the sanctic discipline have casting cost of 1, which is low enough to throw 2 or 3 dice, get it off fairly reliably and minimise the risk of getting a perils result.

So where am I going with this?  Sanctuary and Hammerhand, that's where I'm going.

Hammerhand gives a boost to the Orks rather paltry S3 and makes them far more reliably killy even if they didn't charge, not to mention putting a Nob with big choppa at S8 and your average PK nob S10, making both easily capable of busting open most vehicles.  Not to mention you Weirdboy is now S8 with a force weapon.

Sanctuary comes into play when you add a Big Mek and the Mega Force Field, or a Skyshield Landing Pad.  This boosts your Invul save to a 3+.

So, to put this in unit terms, you can have a 7 man unit of Nobs, 3 PKs and 4 Big choppas, a Painboy, lvl 2 Weirdboy, and a Big Mek with Mega force Field all for 500ish points.  That is a scary unit.
You could also drop the Big Mek and take bikes to get a 3+ cover save (after turbo-boosting) and simply drag the Weirdboy along for the strength buff

Alternately, you could take a large unit of artillery on a Skyshield Landing pad, add a Weirdboy and get a 3++ for your weapons battery.

Hows that for durable?

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.

ORKS: PART TRES

To continue our little game of who's the worst, lets move onto the Heavy stuff.

The Mek Gunz come with enough variety to make them usefull no matter what you need.  They can do anti-air, anti-infantry, anti-tank, anti-heavy infantry.  They are artillery, and you can buy them extra grots, which is essentially extra wounds, you can have 5 in a unit and they cost, at MOST 30 points each.  Nuff said about them.

Battlewagons are still pretty good, they are versatile enough to suit any need you want and there is a pretty good formation out for them in which you can use all those dirty tank shock shenanigans I posted about earlier.

I couldn't find any decent art so you get to look at this bad boy instead.

This guy is basically a Dreadnaught, and has all the same foibles and flaws as all the others.  While the Deff Dread is a little cheaper, you get the discount because of his abysmal BS and just as terrible I.  His low initiative insures that he will lose almost any other fight against another Dreadnought, despite being able to get 6 attacks.  His BS is so low you want to ditch the shooting weapons, but if he happens to get immobilised he becomes actually useless instead of almost useless.  He is pretty scary if he can get up close and personal, but still needs tons of support from getting overrun or tied up.  Otherwise there is a chance he spends the entire game killing 3 worthless models a turn, or gets killed by a squad of marines with krakk grenades.  Ouch.
A potential use would be to buff a big unit of Killa Kans.  They could be his backup that he so desperately needs and a decent fire base to boot.

Which is a perfect segue into the Killa Kans.  Now, I don't honestly believe that these guys are bad, but I have not seen them in a list since the new book came out and I know the one reason why...
The Cowardly Grots rule.  This rule really chomps my ass, mainly because it takes one of the best gun in the ork book, the Grotzooka, and potentially makes it worthless on that critical turn.
However I feel that the addition of this rule is offset by the fact you can now take 6 of these bad boys per unit.  They are 50 points standard, and while not as effective at taking out tanks with their CCW being nerfed, they still work in conjunction with the Deff Dread who can handle a vehicle or 2.
Much like the Warbuggies, these guys can be used to take up a large footprint to limit enemy movement, yet are tough enough to withstand bolters and can put out some hurt in the assault phase.
I like this unit maxed out with a couple rokkits/KMBs and a couple skorchas for Wall of Death.  Get a Big Mek with a KFF and a unit of boys and make the old Kan wall list good again.
Not to mention the Dread Mob from the Waagh Ghazghkull has got some potential.  You might be able to fit in a small CAD, otherwise the army is unbound, but I would love to see that list play out.

The Gork/Morkanaught were so close to being great units, but unfortunately they missed the super-heavy boat.  These things are so close to being super heavies it's ridiculous. As it is, 250 points for these guys is WAY too high a cost.  Especially since the previously mentioned Deff Dread could tear one of these things apart for less than half the points.  A Chaos or Imperial Dreadnought could rip this thing a new B-hole and not be terribly worried about the return attacks.
Now that's not to say that AV 13 is something to scoff at, AV 13 is a pretty tough nut to crack for a lot of armies out there, and considering that you can load them with 4 meks and Grot riggers, this thing is potentially invincible.
No matter how you look at it, these guys are still a pretty big threat.  A S10 AP1 CCW and enough guns even for orks to hit something will mean these guys will do some work.  The way to make sure they get the job done is to keep them alive as long as possible.  A KFF nearby to stop those big guns, and fill him full of meks to fix anything that gets broken.  Then when you get close you can unleash the burna boys/meks in one direction and have him charge off in another.

Lootas are still good, except they have been moved from the Elites slot to the Heavy slot.  Which makes a pretty big difference because the Elites slot is pretty packed with sweet sweet nougatey goodness.  All the same tricks from previous editions work, take them a big unit or multiple small ones for all that Dakkadakka.  Now something that is new with these guys, you can upgrade 3 of them to be meks, and you can give them killsaws which is a chainfist.  So these guys are not your typical heavy weapons unit and hopeless in combat.

Flashgitz have gotten significantly better since the last codex, yet I still don't see them being used.  110 for 5 of them, with the stats of a Nob and toting a 3 shot S5 gun all with a bosspole and a Gitfinda that boosts you to BS 3 if you don't move.  The only downside is their gun has a AP of D6, and no one likes random shit.  Think of it this way though, AP D6 is better than AP4 50% of the time, and at AP 3 or less they are killing 5 marines a shooting phase(assuming they didn't move).  Don't forget they still have the Stat line of a Nob, so they have no qualms when it comes to punching something in the face after they shoot the shit out of it first.  Add some little Meks with Killsaws for a little more punchy power and to keep that Character count high for Mob Rule and the obligatory challenge chump, THEN throw them in a dedicated battlewagon and WOOOOHOOOO!

So that's it for the units, time to take a look at the not so popular wargear, now I'm not going to talk about all the basic weapons and stuff that I might have covered while talking about the unit that has them...
but I do want to talk about the Bubblechukka for just a second.  These things are idiotic, even in their description they don't make sense and they take the randomness to a new level.  I have never seen them used, and don't expect to.  These may be one of the few exceptions of a unit I won't even bother trying to make worth it.  Moving on.

The Shokk Attack Gun is another one of those weapons that takes random to new levels, but at least it's AP 2 permanently.  The randomness is on the S of the shot, which also corresponds with a chart which makes something wacky happen on the roll of a double, or an 11, and only 4 of those results are actually bad.  If you happen to roll 12, the gun has the Vortex special rule, which means there is a large blast vortex swirling around in your opponent's back field.  This gun seems fairly simple to use, point it at some hard infantry and watch as that unit is torn apart by super angry warp infused Gretchin, it's not reliable enough to point at hard vehicles, but with ordinance, can take out some lighter vehicles.  The downside is it's 50 points but I can see a Big Mek taking one of these and joining a unit of Artillery with like minded targets, like a kustom mega-kannon.

Headwoppa's Killchoppa is a big choppa with rending and causes ID on to wound rolls of 6.  It's not a bad weapon, but a power Klaw is way better.  The power klaw is way more versatile, making the Warboss S10 so he can take out vehicles with ease, but the Killchoppa will strike a I4.  I could see a Warboss joining a unit of meganobs with Mad Dok to get the extra attacks and getting some swings in before the power klaw rip everything else to shreds.  This weapon would be decent for taking out high T low I multi-wound creatures, as long as you roll that magical 6.  Taking an attack squig would be useful to max your hitting potential.

Da Fixer uppers are largely not needed as you can get multiple Meks for pretty cheap, but if you are playing a mechanised type list, or a walker heavy list, it might be worth it to boost you fixin power to a 3+.  Like a dread mob from the Gahzghkull suppliment.

Last of the wargear is the Dead Shiny Shoota, which is a gun so we all know where that's going.  It is only 5 points, but even though it's twin-linked it's still nearly useless, and on top of that it has a chance at hitting your own models.  However, since it's dirt cheap, I can see some potential.  It has 6 shots, and if you also buy a gitfinda, you will hit 4-5 times if you stand still, but with a range of 18" you will probably be moving.  Now you might think that overwatch is a good use for it, but again, it can hit your own models for each miss(after re-rolls).

So that's it.  I've covered all the units and wargear.  I hope you got at least a gleam of something useful, because I did while writing it.

Up next will be the Dark Eldar

Until next time, keep them dice rollin.